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  • drnicoladepaul

You don't love things because they are perfect

Updated: Feb 25, 2023


“You don’t love things because they are perfect.
You love them because they are yours.”
- From the new Willow mini-series (I think)

This quote captured my attention, and I wanted to share it with you as it puts context around my “Why” for working in healthcare. Maybe it will resonate with you too.

I’ve shared some of my story in the Connect with Your Why episode, and I'll share a little more here.

But there is a catch.

My story isn’t complete without yours. We are connected, and I would LOVE to hear YOUR story. And your why.

Why do I care about healthcare systems and those working in them? Because I have invested my adult life in working in imperfect healthcare systems and building friendships with the beautifully human people who work inside them.

Why do I care about parenting? Because I happened to give birth to a vivacious and delightful little girl who thinks she is a cat much of the time. When I was pregnant, I remember wondering if I could give her back if things didn’t work out. There’s a return policy, right? Nope. And now, I'm on the journey of growing into an imperfect parent for the threenager living in my home.

Why do I consider myself “a dog person”? Because my husband dragged us to the humane society to adopt a skinny mama dog a couple of years ago, and she claimed me as “her human.” And now I walk her every day, at least once.

Why do I care about burnout? Because I started burning out as an early career psychologist but was too stubborn to notice until my burnout developed into a full-blown post-partum mood disorder. I felt ashamed to be struggling with my mental health as a psychologist and tried every self-help option and even made a cross-country move before I finally asked for professional help. No one should struggle with burnout alone.

Why do I work with leadership teams? Because I understand how much you care about your people. And I am energized and fulfilled when I watch your leadership teams “get it” and start to make small changes to turn toward your people, which in turn creates a cascade of tiny but powerful changes that repair relationships and re-engage the people in your system.

There’s no big “why” driving what I do and why I care about healthcare. But there are many small whys. The everyday experiences and interactions that have changed me and made healthcare mine. I don’t love healthcare because it’s perfect. Far from it. I love working in healthcare because it is where I live. And I want to live in a beautiful well-nourished community. I love working with healthcare leaders because you are the people who inspire me and encourage me on my tough days. Thank you!

What’s your story? Why do you care about making things better in healthcare? Have you struggled with burnout? What challenges get in the way of creating the change you want to see in your healthcare system?



What’s new on Menders?

This week Dr. Sahana D’Silva highlights the power of who you are as a leader (not just what you do). You are a powerful catalyst for positive outcomes in your healthcare system. Just be you. And bring your whole self into every moment and interaction.





I packed a quick and dirty organizational well-being assessment plus 27 action items into a 35-minute video. Wowza!

This idea-packed video complements the personal stories I shared in the How-To season of the Menders podcast.

So grab a cup of coffee. Grab your earbuds. And get creative about how you'll create transformation magic in your healthcare system today. Download the mini-course!


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